Imagine waking up to the sound of your new baby crying and feeling desperate to go to her… but unable to summon the resolve to get out of bed. Imagine bursting into tears whenever someone asks how you’re doing with your new little miracle. Imagine having such overwhelming anxiety about your role as a new mom that you are virtually paralyzed with fear.

You’re imagining postpartum depression. It affects one in ten new moms. Characterized by insomnia, changes in appetite, difficulty concentrating and feelings of guilt, despair or worthlessness, postpartum depression can feel like an impossible situation. But it does get better.

ePregnancy talked to Rachel Jarosik, a new mom who suffered for 8 months from the isolation of postpartum depression, to give you a better look at what it’s really like.

Rachel’s Story
My husband Keith and I were ecstatic to learn we were pregnant with our first child after trying for 3 months. I was nervous, but not in a negative way. We weren’t sure just what to expect, but we were so excited to be on the brink of something so new and wonderful. I had no idea then how wonderful — and difficult — my transition into motherhood would be.

I had a very smooth pregnancy. I was tired in my first trimester (partly from working full time), but when we started announcing our good news in my third month, that went away. It was so fun: people always asked how I was doing, and my friends and co-workers wondered if I thought I would have a boy or a girl. I didn’t buy maternity clothes until my fifth month, when my husband dragged me to the stores to pick out a few things. I was amazed at how comfortable I was after that! It was a very hot summer and we didn’t have central air conditioning, so my husband put a couple of window AC units in our Chicago condo. (We hoped that the rolling brownouts that were occurring that summer wouldn’t affect us.) I swelled up quite a bit, but that was okay. We were going to be parents!